Things to think about...

Lately, I have been thinking about my past...not that it matters but I think of it. I long for those carefree days when there was no pressure, I felt happier (even when I was going through teen hell), summer was fun and I looked forward to things. I know I have changed, life happened. I am older but still I dwell on those old memories, old feelings. Like having them again will change things or make me feel better (cause I know, deep down, that they really won't). Nothing is ever as good as it was when you first remember it...which is why you long for it again. A first boyfriend, the anticipation of a first kiss, feeling like this sexy person that can flirt, have fun and not have any guards up.
But before you think the worst of me, I love my husband very much. He knows me more than anyone else. He gets me, he fights for me. He supports me, he holds me. I wouldn't do anything to jeopardize that. But still, the memories flitter through my mind. So how do I try not to wish for those feelings again? It would be awesome if you could just magically have those feelings again? It's like a drug rush. But oh well...since I am not going back in a time machine to being 13 and in love for the first time, I must get over it and focus on my marriage and making THOSE feelings stronger and stronger so that when I am feeling nostalgic, I can shrug and say "Please...that was so lame!" Sigh...